Fooling thyself

I now know what to do.

Kim Jonghyun, thank you for the idea. It will still be my original plan.

I still have the charcoal. I just don't have yet a reliable source of fire. I'll buy soon the camping stove. This is my last tool. And it will just be a matter of time when to execute the plan.

Night wind breeze. When was the last time I felt it?
Too bad I'll never have this again - maybe on the other side?

If only I'm not tired and bored with "living". Each day, I was trying to convince myself that "living" is magnificent. Well, maybe, I am just fooling myself. The pain, suffering, and boredom are still there, sitting on the corner, waiting for the right time to devour me. And when they do, I have no choice but to give in, since I'm already tired.