Tha would be nice

Sa SG pa talaga ko nakapag-munimuni ah. Sa SG pa ko nagkaroon ng time for myself. To think the things over.

I was not able to come up with an answer but I formulated one. Not sure though. Just prayed it to Him and let's see.

While waiting, I must continue living. To continue this life, I must never stop moving.

Short term goal: Continue work in IT. To gain experience while I fund my other future scheduled travels. Also to save in case.

Things that I would love to happen: get masters degree in Europe. Get high position in business with high paying. Salaries will be used as capitals to my dream businesses. Build beach resort in Palawan and atleast two restaurants in Europe. They are extreme dreams, aren't they? Well. Wala masama mangarap. :D

God, you there? Please help me to decide about this life.
If You would let me, I would rather die now and be with You there. But I can't avoid thinking about my youngest sibling.

I might need an inspiration.. God, is it okay to meet now one of the soulmates you have for me? Can you guide this person so that we now can meet? :D

An interesting mini encounter

An interesting mini illusion of mine.

We went to Universal Studios. First ride, we decided to get to Transformers. It's the best ride so far.

Outside queue, took pictures, chat.. There are people kept lookin at us. Also saw that some of them looked at me. Maybe because I was wearin a Korean fashion clothing? White and full of black stars - shirt and cap.

Still chatting and laughing while taking pictures.. Saw this one fella looking at me. At first, I didnt mind. Next, saw again and recognized that this fella was also wearin a white shirt with black stars - but small stars. I was wearin the large ones obviously. Dont mind again. I thought, this fella was just one of the few people who kept looking at me.

Went inside, more loops to go. Took pictures, chatted, and laughed. Saw this fella again stole a glance at me. Then I taught, "nice. This fella was really wearin the style as I have. Kept looking at me because of familiarity with clothes. I wear? And a Korean or Chinese? Not sure." In the loops, I saw glances and thought, "maybe a Korean?"

Then... I was lookin at the floor. My hands at both side rails. My palms and only the tips of my fingers wide resting. Then I felt a sudden very quick touch. This fella was about to put the right hand on the rail from the opposite side when suddenly recognized my hand there. There was only a quick touch. Yeah this fella quickly left to follow the line. I didn't look. Still starin at the floor. But I thought, "it's this fella." And was still thinking "is this Chinese or Korean? Hopefully a Korean."

Finally went inside. "Oh at the ride before us." Then ride the fun. Before it started I thought, "If im going to see u again, i'll stare at you for 10secs. From there i'll know if you're a Korean or Chinese."

After the ride, went outside. Never saw this fella again. These are my thoughts at the rest of the stay inside the Universal Studios:
"If you only waited for me outside the Transformers, i might get your number. Haha."
"Hopefully you're a Korean. Or else, nevermind. XD"
"It's not the I dont like Chinese. I know them. But I cant imagine myself with a Chinese. It'll be a mess."
"If and only if i see you again, will look at you for 5secs..maybe 10secs."
"I dont know your face. I just remembered the shirt you wear."
"Have you changed clothes? Or have you already left Universal?

Haha. Guess it's the second time I had an encounter with a foreigner inside a park. Bye!
-Rove

Sent from my iPhone

Weird heartbeat

My heartbeat looks weird. This whole day. It's really weird. I can feel its beating even without putting my hand on my chest. My whole body can feel the heartbeat. And the timings and rhythm vary.

Beat is 12--12--12--12--12. Then all of a sudden a 123--12--12--12--12--123.

The weird behavior never stopped until now..

What happened?

Oh well papel

Oh well. Hindi ko na-forsee na mag-over ako sa expenses ko. Expense na wala sa budget. +_+

Always in a tight situation...

Hopefully, I'll enjoy the SG trip without spending too much. Though how much I badly want to buy stuffs for the kids at pasalubong sa older ones, got no budget anymore. T_T

On the other side, God please free me from my misery. I wanted to quit and rest but how can I fund my scheduled future travels? But then change in policy looks like pushing me away already. Oh God let me hear your voice. I don't know what road or decision I'll need to make. Please give me the knowledge and wisdom to understand the situation and to know your answer. In Jesus name, Amen!

Heck! Lets be a monk!

I'm fucking serious. I need time for myself alone. Since I got nowhere to go to and never have a go-to person, I want to spend the rest of my life for myself.

These fucking responsibilities are just fake! Kept on demanding. Always shoving money into their face. Quenching me until the last drop of my blood. But then, didn't get anything in return. They're just fucking using me. This world is full of fucking users

Can I just be a monk instead? So that I can no longer see their fucking faces.

Monk.. Let's look.

WaaAh!!! You're killing me 100 times

Wata tax. -_- We're paying full tax and you people just put it in your pockets!

Nyway, I'm on a tight budget this month and I think until next year March.. So many trips.. And mom kept on asking some bucks. Wae?

Gusto ko na talaga mag-resign. Resign not because of my job/role alone but with all the stresses people gave to me in work and outside work. Even at home, my mom is stressing me out big time! Maybe a sign of menopause? I dont know and I dont care! Sick!

I want to take a rest now..peacefully. Away from all these pressurize bosses. They're choking me.

Now I think about it, I've already given much to my family members and friends. Then they just take me for granted. How could they?! I dont deserve this!

Kill me now God. Take me now with you Jesus. I've had enough. I need love, pure and Godly love.

So help me God. Amen.

Perfect love only in dreams

God.. Can I have a wish to you? When I'm having a very good and nice dream, is it okay not to wake up forever? Please let me experience the beautiful things about Love even just in dreams. I would love to live with it. Love in dreams is perfect. This without flaws. Honesty. Happiness. When I wake up, reality looks like just a bad dream. I choose to live in dreams than in reality.

So please..if I'm having a very good dream, please don't let me wake up anymore.

Thank you and I love you. :)

Waaah!! Burn out!

I want and need to go somewhere this weekend~!! Need to relax, breathe fresh air, and rest. But the place is not a problem, neither the price. The problem is, there should be someone who can come with me. Wae? Doushite? Why does it have to be a minimum of two? Why can't it just one? Solo travel? +_+

Argh. Discrimination.

Waaah! Bat puro good for 2 or more lang lahat ng nakikita kong accommodation, overnight stay, whatever?? Hindi ba pwede mag-relax pag mag-isa lang??? -_-"

Current movie list

Movies that I wanna watch:
- Rurouni Kenshin
- Planes
- Tekken 2
- The Expendables 3
- Guardians of the Galaxy
- Hercules

Stress reliever. Watch movies.

Work work work. Working like a s____.

Na-sstress na ko sa work. It started in the second half of July. Ngayon ko lang ulit naramdaman na nag-wowork talaga ko. In my stay sa former team, I only felt working twice. At hindi pa yun kagaya ngayon. But now, I really felt the pressure at the same time, stress. It's like I was only working to catch someone else, meet their wants, and satisfy them. What I really got into? T_T Also, I don't like this kind of pressure. It's like people are saying, "You should already know them." Hello? I'm just new. Though it's not a right to blame because of being "new", I'm still new. There're still lots of things I need to learn - lots of technical terms. I said "yes" to this responsibility because I wanted to learn and experience new things. But assuming that I should have already known, it's a different thing. It's not just weekdays I work, I also work during weekends. It's a family business. Life is really pressuring me right now..with all the responsibilities. I need to take a week off~! Think only about myself. Think about what I really like. Think about my dreams. I need a week off away from all of these things!!! -- Nothing is impossible with Him. =D

Wat a memory..

I dreamt of you again. But this time, I kissed you in the forehead, held your hands, and hugged you for more than 3mins. And I said, "Mahal mo parin pala ko? Nagkabalikan na tayo? Can't we go back to the 'ligawan' process to have formality?" Then you said, "This is not right. I will leave you again anyway because I'll be going somewhere soon. I'll hurt you again for sure."

Oh God.. Why is it becoming worse? Please free me from 1017's memory. It's already beyond 4 years. I wanna completely move on by forgetting everything about 1017. This memory sometimes lingers and haunts me down. Oh please God...