Tiring holiday

This is me to my ハニー. No matter how many beautiful faces I see, I don't mind at all. 😆

———-

Had a tiring road trip with my ハニー. After dropping the kids in Taguig, went straight to booksale in Pasig. ハニー is a bookworm. 😉 Then went to Sta Lucia to eat at Greenwich and ハニー took a haircut (#FindingLea 😂). Bought some things in Daiso. Then meds and vitamins in Mercury.

I was tired literally as I was driving for 50km. And imagine traffic in the metro. 😲

Now, instead of reading a book, ハニー fell asleep. 😆😂🤣

Dosage of Quotes

The No Choice to The King of One’s Life

Why am I annoyed?

No matter how hard I put a defense before ハニー, she still defend that goon. Instead of blaming and getting furious to ハニー after what she has done, I am furious to the man who I think took advantage of her. But in the end, she still defend that man. Does it mean, am not doing the right thing - defending ハニー? And instead, I should get mad and blame her for the incident?

I don't know.

I remember in the convo they had in Telegram, ハニー didn't even defended me when that man insulted me and called me "tibo". Just wow! Ako kabit? 🤬

And now, into my face, she still defend that fucking ugly man! 🤬 Who am I really? Is he supposed to be the chosen one and not me? What if he was able to get a job, will ハニー still choose me or choose to stay with that goon?

I don't know.

Everytime I bring up that "unfaithfulness incident", I always have the feeling of "I have no right to say bad things about that ugly faggot".

Feel like I am "No choice kaya ikaw nalang". Para akong kabit. This is what I feel. 😐

Sabi nga nila, “Hindi naman maghahanap ng iba ang isang tao kung kuntento sila sa una nila.” And moreover, they find 2nd one or kabit when they are not satisfied sexually with their legal partner. Kaya hindi malayong ang kabit ay para lang sa sex pleasures. 😑

———

When will I be treated like a king...

Siguro pag millionaire or billionaire na ko. 😂 When that happens, I'll have all the beautiful women in the world chase me and plead to me for me to be with them. 😆😂

Relationship = Job

“When you trust too much, people will make a fool out of you.”

“Do unto others what you want others do unto you.”

One more cheating, and I’m done.

I’m not feeling inlove everyday but I chose this relationship. Dapat lang na panindigan ko ‘to and I should work on it. 

“Being in a relationship is a job.”

It’s not a game na pag di kana nag-eenjoy, mag-qquit ka agad.

God is my refuge

Read the convo between ハニー and her mother. I don't know what to say anymore. I hate to say this but tita seems like tolerating ハニー do such extramarital relationships (i.e. kabit).

I grew up differently. I have my beliefs. I hate cheaters and kabit when I was a kid - even until now. Maybe because I am surrounded by them - my brother, older sister, and even my father. And I don’t want to add up to their numbers. Some of them eventually changed as they grow old and some, I hope, will change in the future. I’ve also seen the tears of the people they have hurt and it makes me furious - a sense of injustice. It’s just a matter of acceptance and forgiveness to be able to forget and move on.

Only God teaches me to forgive and forget. God, who is the supreme being can easily forgive human beings, why can't I? I don't have the right not to forgive anyone. God always remind me to love my enemies. It's because, they are also His children. He created everyone equal. It's just that most of us fell to our own weaknesses and pitfalls.

For now, I don't wanna get involve with ハニー's family. I need to li-low. Not see them as much as I could. I'd rather keep my space than see myself tangled into a worldly fight.

———

Keep your distance Rove. Stay away from people who will only bring you distraught.

😎 Concentrate. Work hard. Play hard. 😎

Just do what you think is right and you'll achieve your goal - get rich and be successful! 😁

Just keep on going... You're cool as ever! 😎

———

Thank you God for not leaving my family despite the hardships in life. Your love saves us all, human beings. Thank you Christ! I love you all! 😘 Amen! 🙏

In time

Ayaw ko na God.

No matter how hard I try to screen all the bad stuff from her, she'll always look at the negative side. And in the end, it's my fault - always my fault.

It's been a trauma to me but I'm trying my best to accept, forget, and move on from it.

It's true that I wanna be always around for her. I don't wanna see her get lost again. I wanna guide her as much as possible. And when the time has come that she finally realized she needed a man, I can be an eldest sibling and bestfriend to screen all the men before choosing someone who she can get married with.

Because of this incident, the only thing I can do is atleast give her the best life she deserves. It does not exclude giving her to a man. As long as that man can provide all her needs and wants in life, she'll be fine. And someone who will not take advantage of her weaknesses. Someone she'll grow up with. And hopefully, someone who is good looking than me. 😆

Don't know if she'll understand my real intention. But you know God my heart and my mind. Always lead me to your greatness. Keep me away from the people and things that lead me to pitfalls.

This is the reason I really need to get rich and successful. When I do, I don't have to beg for someone's time and affection. I don't have to be an option or second choice anymore. I don't have to borrow money and be in debt. 😆 I will be the second/third after God and family to someone. 😁

In time, the truth will be revealed. The truth will set us free.

Brain transplant

I still love my life.

But when this brain unable to stop, I have no choice left. I need to end this brain from overthinking more.

Sometimes, I thought of donating my brain to someone that might need it. And will just ask for another brain. I don't mind if I will lose memories - it doesn't matter anymore.

As long as it will stop my brain for overthinking, I'm okay to do anything to release it.

Might as well search over the internet for any org that is needing a brain - maybe for experiments or what.

Whatever they wanted to do with my brain, I'm fine as long as they will pay 500 million pesos to my family. And they will make me alive after removing my brain. I'll go for it!

😎 be cool Rove 😎

Confused mind and heart

Why am I feeling this way?

It started yesterday. My chest now feels so heavy. So many negative thoughts circling around my mind. Felt like I was about to faint awhile ago.

Is it because I was not able to take my med for 3 nights already?
Is it because I'm always eating my dinner very late or not at all?
Is it because something's up with my current environment?

I know I am a negative absorber. Means, I easily absorb negative aura around me - people's complaints in real life and in social media. I usually ignore it and just laugh at it but my subconscious mind digests and processes it without my knowledge. In return, I will explode at one time.

God, am I crazy? It felt like I wanted to check-in myself to monastery and meditate with the monks. 😣

Help me God.

I just wanna jump and laugh at these things. I don't wanna worry about life nor the people around me. Bahala sila on what they wanted to do with their life. I'm done and already fed up with my role of being "a leader", "an eldest", etc. I don't wanna please anyone anymore. Whatever the people around me do with their life: work hard, play hard, or get lost, I should not care anymore! I'm not a god nor a messiah to shoulder everyone's burden and help them solve their own problems or help them change to be a better person.

What if I suddenly die, will they be able to stand up on their own? Will they be able to change theirselves to be a better person - a Godly person? They should.

My mind is about to explode. 😵

God, is it my calling? To be a human shepherd? Only Christ can be a shepherd. Even I, get lost at times. People around me should seek Christ's guidance too - whenever they are lost or not.

God, I commit to you my confused mind and heart. Let Your will Thy be done. Amen! 🙏

Unprepared

I have not taken my med for 3 nights already.

I'm not sure if it's the reason my mind sometimes think of crazy things - paranoia in a way. 😖 Or it's because I am not eating dinner at the right time for how many nights already. 😓

Whatever might be the reason, I just stopped and pray.

"I commit to you, oh God, my mind and my thoughts. I don't know why my thoughts were like that. I know I am a slow person and I process and digest things very late (e.g. after few days). But whatever it is, I raise up to you everything. Please cleanse my heart and mind from earthly things. Fill my thoughts and hearts with Godly things. Help me not to think such crazy things anymore. I pray all these things in the mighty name of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, amen!" 🙏

———-

I need to pay the unbilled charges of my CC tomorrow so that I can book tours and accommodation for HK trip. Though my budget is very tight - as I had overlooked and didn't prepare ahead of time - I am still rich! I declare to the universe.

I am rich!
Rich in love!
Rich in finances!
Amen! 🙏

———-

Though I don't feel like going to my follow-up check-up as I don't have budget yet, I need to so that I can get discount coupons for my meds. I also need to talk to my doctor that my dosage can now be reduce to half.

———-

God, please help me to be prepared at all times. I might always ignore problems or issues around me as I want to prioritize my mental being. However, they are still there lurking, trying to devour my mind at anytime of the day. Help me God. I couldn't take so much mental stress constantly without any rest. I trust you with all my heart and mind. I commit to you my life, my heart, and my mind. Thank you for everything. ☺️

Time with you

Pic: last night at 日本ばして

Had a date with my ハニー at CBTL. 😍

Knowing to meet my ハニー after work makes me excited everytime. ☺️😄 Finish work asap while checking the time every hour. Then step on the gas and drive as fast as I can once I enter the car while an upbeat music plays in the background. 😆😂

This is how excited I am.😜

I care less whether I still have money or not, I will still spend the evening with my ハニー. Money can be earn, but time is not.

"Time is gold." 😁

Just finished finalizing the HK-MC tour inclusions. Will start looking for accommodations in HK tomorrow. Once my payment in CC has reflected, I will book accommodation right away. 😆

お休みなさい。💤😴

Dinner date

Had a dinner date with my ハニー. 😍
We ate at 日本ばして。🍱

Eating good food + nice conversation with my ❤️.

More like this in the future~ 🙏

Soon: Aug 18-19, Ilocos trip

My heart

It was a long day today.
Tiresome but happy. ☺️

Feasib project of ハニー has finally ended! Yey! 😁
Congrats to ハニー！

It was also a rainy day. ☔️

Together with my gf's close friend, we ate at the BBQ house for lunch after their class.
Went for an errand then finally went home.

Sleep, eat, hang out with baby, then sleep. 😴

It was a tiring week but very meaningful week. I've discovered more and more about my ハニー's life. And I love her more and more. ☺️

——-

Thank you my God. Please be with me and ハニー till the end. Amen! 🙏

God’s love prevails

Baby Charles. Your mom is a strong-willed person. And I am deeply amazed that despite going through hardships in life, she still doesn't give up. 🤨

She was my reason why I didn't give up life. She's my inspiration.

It makes me smile when I see her happy. I want to make her happy. And I will do my best to stay by her side, supporting her, no matter what this life can bring. 😁

Baby Charles. Please continually look upon us from heaven. I know you are more sad when mom is sad. But don't worry much, God and I will always be there for her. ☺️

I love the both of you - you and your mom. ☺️

Guardian Angel

Baby Charles.

I'll be stronger for your mom. We may not be together till the end, but I will still be her bestfriend till the end. I will take care of her up to the best as I can.

Baby Charles.

Sayang di tayo nagmeet. I know you are a handsome boy, just like your mom. Soon, in heaven, we'll meet. We'll chat in the playground. And talk anything under the sun. We'll talk how stubborn your mom is but funny at the same time.

Let's compete in the monkey bar! I was an expert when I was a kid. 😆

Baby Charles.

Please always look upon your mom from there. You are now her guardian angel. ☺️

またね。 😄

Too painful to handle

As much as I don't want to but I'm crying right now. 😭 I'm sorry but I've been following this page for few days already.

The knowledge and assurance that you know na tapos na sila ng kabit nya. Pero seeing this, I couldn't control myself but to feel jealous.

I am the legal partner. I love my woman and she loves me too. But why is it painful that they have their own page wherein my girlfriend has already forgotten our FB page. 😔

Why does it feel like I was just borrowing my girlfriend's time and I was just an option.

——-

Don't look pitiful Rove! Your woman loves you. She came back to your arms for good. You've been doing great so far. You are patient and loving towards her. She knows it and she appreciates it. Don't feel jealous over something that doesn't matter anymore.

You were born for His greatness! You were born not to be an option but to be the only and last.

Just cry it all until no tears are left. Tears will make you stronger. Cry it all until your heart gets tired then your mind takes the lead.

Take heart! And be courageous! God will not leave you and your heart broken. Your life will be bountiful!

———

I love you God! Thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for making me stronger each day. Thank you for making me smile and happy each day. Thank you for keeping me and my love ones healthy.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight."

Work life balance 😱

I took an SL today. I didn't want to but my lead and my manager advised me to.

I need complete physical recovery. P&L week is just around the corner and I need to be there for my team.

Before signing out, I made last "bilins" and did some small tasks. I also moved my stand-up meeting with my devs to tomorrow. Piotr is a capable resource and he doesn't need to be micromanaged. 😉 I'm thankful he is one of our developers. 😁

Kai, on the other hand, volunteered to lead the P&L checkpoint I set today. I told her I might not be able to join as I will rest and sleep. As time passes by, Kai is becoming more and more independent. Not too soon, she'll be able to lead both P&L towers with confidence. 😁 And when that time comes, I will have a lighter load. 😆 I will now be able to put more time to my 1PMP PM role and Finance Lead role. 😊

In time, everything will go into its right and perfect place. So help me God. 🙏

Sorry, I suck big time

Why?

Whatever I'll do, I will always be the bad cop.

No matter how hard I tried to please the people I value the most, in the end, I'm always the one to blamed.

No matter how hard I tried to do what is good, in the end, it's always causing trouble to the people I love.

Why am I still breathing if I don't do any good anymore?

This life.

Sorry, if I'm causing too much trouble.
Sorry, if I didn't do any better anymore.
Sorry, if I'm not capable of doing anything to please you.

I'm sorry, I suck big time.

Open letter 😜

To ハニー,

I love you not just because I really wanted us to end up together but I love you as a person.

I want you to be healthy and happy. Let me take care of you, may not be as your partner, but atleast your bestfriend. Not until I will be able to find a "perfect" man for you, I will always be here for you. A man who I know can provide all your needs and understands you the most - whatever your mood will be.

Yes, I am okay to give you to a man when the time has come that you have decided to get married to a man. I've already accepted the fact way before I met you that it's not impossible that my girlfriend will have a change of partner preference. #beentheredonethat 😆

Whatever happens, through thick or thin, I will always be here to guide you and support you. I don't want you to go astray. When you do, just get back up right away. 😉 Don't stay longer at the bottom.

I want you to find inner peace and happiness. Let me there by your side as you take the road of life and face challenges in life.

Don't forget to pray to Him.
When in doubt, pray.
When you don't know what to do, pray.
When you are sad, pray.
When you are angry, pray.
Whatever your emotion is, just pray.
You'll be calmer, I assure you. ☺️

Yours,
Rove 😎

My prayer

I'd rather be called and treated as a "bestfriend" than be called a "tibo" by a kabit.

I never wanna try to have sex with a man. I'd rather go to science to get pregnant and have a baby than have multiple sex with a man I'm not in an official relationship with. And I think, I will never have sex with a dirty man.

Love is more than sex. It's companionship and honesty. And I deserve respect, honesty, and love.

I'm a human being too. God created me - to be awesome! To be great! To get rich! To be happy!

I am hardworking, kind, respectable, honest, faithful, loyal, and loved! And I also deserve to be treated the same way.

God please help me. Lead me to your greater glory. Cleanse my heart and mind. Fill my heart with your love.

Please bless Cha, Mcdo Manong guard, and all the people in the world. Bless them. Cleanse their minds and hearts. Give them a clear and peace of mind. Fill their hearts with your overflowing love so that they can love themselves and forgive themselves. No one can love theirselves except themselves. No one can provide them true happiness but their themselves only. No one can provide them inner peace but You Yourself only.

I pray all these things in the might name of my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, Amen. 🙏

Sit back and relax

Rove, don't be discouraged.
Just sit back and relax.
God is still preparing the woman of your life - your soon-to-be-wife. 💍🎊
And God is also preparing you.
So that when two of you meet, both of you are already prepared. ☺️

Never be discouraged.
God is there.
He'll take care of your heart while waiting for your the one. 🙂
Trust in Him. He has greater plans ahead of you.
Plans to prosper you and give you future. 👌

Amen. 🙏

😂🤣😂🤣

I told Kai,

"Dapat mag work lahat ng P&L team sa Sep 18-21. Friendship over na kami ng bestfriend ko dahil sa kinancel ko trip namin. Dapat worth it yung pag stay ko sa office. 😜"

😆😂🤣😂😆

If not, #ktnxbye.
Mag-submit na ko resignation after. 😉
They are not worth fighting for.
Been trying to balance and sacrificing lots of things to serve everyone and everything in my life.
"One cannot serve two masters at a time."

😎be cool😎

Ayaw man sa lovelife o gusto, itigil mo na yan Rove!

Wag na ipilit pa ang sarili!

Di kana nya gusto o mahal!

Mahirap ba intindihin yun?!

Tumigil kana Rove!!!

Hindi ka aso! Para sumunud ng sumunod.
Hindi ka stalker gaya nila Jake at Daniel na sobrang panget para ipilit sarili mo.
Tumigil kana! Wala kang balls! Yan tandaan mo!
Kahit na saksakan sila ng panget sa mukha at sa ugali, may balls (maitim lang) sila! That's it!

Enough Rove.

Enough is enough.

You've been sincere and I know you've done your best. 🙂 Wala na tayo magagawa dun kung hindi niya nakikita yun.

Basta, you are beautiful and magnificent Rove, inside and out. Bulag lang sila kaya hindi sila nakaka-appreciate. 😉

They keep on looking on other things despite having things who are always there for them. ☺️

It's not your loss Rove, it's theirs. 😊

Chin up! And move forward!

😎Be cool Rove😎

Rove the Great

😂😂😂 Will still be there someone who can appreciate my existence? 😂😂😂 Someone who still want me in their life. 😂😂😂

Cry until no more tears will flow right from your eyes.
Get sick until any virus will fear getting near to you.

Work until you get fucking rich! And all the beautiful women in the world kill themselves just to be with you. 😆

Do that!
So help me God!

Get rich Rove and laugh all the struggles in life!
Show them that you don't need them but they need you.

Show to the world how fucking great you are! 😎
You are amazing, Rove! 😁

Thoughts when you are sick 👀

I never like having a night dream when I'm sick. 😒 My dreams tend to be weird! 😵

Weird but has a slice of possible truth.

Years ago, I was not able to fight my love for my ex. She already concluded that she wanted to have a "normal family". Get married to a male husband and have kids "naturally".

I didn't have any fighting chance about that. First, I couldn't provide a sperm cell to have my wife-to-be get pregnant "naturally". I just accepted the truth and moved on.

Now, I have my ハニー. I thought she can be my future wife whom will not ask much from me (e.g. give sperm cell for her to get pregnant). She isn't yet but it's not impossible that she'll ask for it. When that time comes, let's see if she will still choose to stay with me or not. Until then, I will give everything I could to win her heart everyday.

While waiting for my time to shine, I need to persevere until I get rich. In this world, money is the primary measure of success. When you are rich, you will not be bullied and you can do anything. It's a worldly rule. I just don't want to get bullied or will look pitiful in the end.

Truth hurts but it is the reality. When you are successful, you'll attract more - e.g. partner in life. You can perceive it as positive or negative. Positive as people will look at you as hardworking and someone to look up to. Negative as people may think, "people might hang around because you have money." It depends on how you will see it.

But as for me, I need to work hard and play hard to be successful and get rich. In this manner, I'll attract the same positive person who will with me to the rest of life - despite people have left me in the past.

So help me God. 🙏

P.S. The best ring will be given to the person who will choose to grow with me until we get old. Through thick or thin. For riches or for poorer. Till death do us apart.

Best ring = my love and my sincerity.

Sickly day

I went home at 8pm. I burnt my tongue. 😆 While waiting for my Angkas driver, I bought Takoyaki from the Banchetto beside the office building. Without thinking, one piece landed right away inside my mouth. There was a worrisome face in the tindera's but it was too late to warned me.

I arrived home quarter to 9pm. I ate dinner right away - tahong, tokwa't baboy, rice, and the remaining Takoyaki I took out.

By the way, why I went home early? Surprising or not, I am sick! 😝😆 Cough worsen. Gotten a flu. Feverish and headache. I can no longer work from 5:30pm actually, but was trying to. Until I couldn't anymore as it will not make sense anymore. 😑

Took a hot bath after eating and now sleeping on the floor, front of my cabinet. It took a lot of effort for me to climb up and down from the bed just using a monoblock chair.

I hate getting sick! I very seldom get sick when I was young. And when I do, it's gonna be a high fever. This is also why I don't know what to do when I am not feeling well. I feel helpless even though I can do things on my own. 😷

On the other side, @&$%#¥£€ work! Role! Job! 🤬Because of you, I can no longer go to Batanes with the plan in my mind. 😡 There is no one I rely on in the team. During Kate's time, I can take a leave anytime as she is dependable. If she doesn't know the task, she'll exert effort to learn fast. And when she's on leave, I can also handle it without her. Now? They depend on me much. Their world is falling apart when I take a leave - SL or VL. It doesn't make sense as their levels are higher than me and I bet their salaries are higher than mine too. 😑

Now, I need to postpone my plan. Need to think of ways how to present it in HK or Macau. They are more of a city than nice and intimate sceneries. Gotta search and plan! 🧐

Nobody will stop me even my bosses! I can no longer delay my lovelife for work. I already did this many times in the past and I can no longer afford to let the deserving and beautiful woman of my life slip away in front of me. 🤨

So help me God. 😊