Tsssss

Tssss.

Magmemessage lang kapag may kailangan. Di nga magawang kamustahin mga anak nya (sila Moo). Pano pa kaya kung tao yan sila Moo, eh di mas malala pa. Tapos lakas pa loob makipag-I love you sa kalaguyo nya. Di pa marunong mag-sorry. Hmp.

Sobrang off sakin yung mga pinag-gagawa nya.

Tssss. Sana marealize nya lahat ng pinaggagawa nya bago pa bumalik sa kanya.

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It seems she’s, consciously or unconsciously, doing the things she hate her mom doing.

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Nothing is impossible with Him. =D

Self-control and Patience

Yo!

You know the feeling? Feeling of wanting to send チャ a 'good morning', 'nakakain kana ba?', 'kamusta ka ngayon?', 'good night', etc., but you couldn't. That you have to control yourself. Because you might fed her up pa lalo. That you have to be more patient especially you said that you can wait for her even how many years it'll take.

Yes! I was able to wait for her for 18 years~, what is another few more years? Especially if she's the woman I would like to spend the rest of my life with. I hope that in time, my sincere intentions will reach her heart and mind.

I'm still in penitence. Now, my phone seems useless now. I don' have any social media nor messaging apps. Nobody to talk/chat to. I now only use my phone for Calm, Teams, and Bubblewitch apps. In my spare time, which is 80% of my time of the day, spend mostly for meditations, reading, and playing Bubblewitch. 

I can do it until end of 2020. Aja aja! Fighting!

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Went to vet for Copper's deworm, Api's deworm (next week 5-in-1), and Tiger's deworm and anti-rabies. Will be back to vet next week for the 4-in-1's 2nd shot of Moo, KatKat, and Rain.

*tap in the back* Good job Rove! ^_^

Nothing is impossible with Him. =D

Another week has ended :)

Bakit ang hirap mag move-on? Even to the nth time na iniwan ako... Dahil sa bago palang? O dahil I already envisioned myself being with her for the rest of my life? Ako lang ba ang nahihirapan o pati sya?
Ano ba ginawa ko dati nung ilang beses nya ko iniwan? Paano ba ko nakamove-on nun...
Eh hindi naman kasi pandemic nun and I can freely go wherever I want to. At kung wala man ako budget nun, I went to gym more frequently. I met new people and hang out with colleagues who always made me laugh.
At kung hindi pandemic, the moment na nagalit sya, pinuntahan ko na sya agad the next day. That's how much I love her. Di ko kaya patagalin yun galit nya kasi sya rin yung nag-susuffer and I never like to see her suffer, especially because of me.

About the furbabies and other stuff, ayaw ko muna pagusapan namin (di rin naman nya ko kinakausap LOL). Gusto ko muna magconcentrate sya sa self-healing nya mentally and emotionally. Her wellness is above all. I still believe in the goodness of her heart kahit ilan beses nya ko pagtabuyan o hindi kausapin. Basta target ko is to complete our furbabies' vaccines by October. Lahat sila including Roshi. Na kay チャ na kung kukunin nya sakin yung mga bata or what. Sya yung nanay eh. She has the final say.
Embrace ko nalang tong sadness every time maalala ko yung feeling na iniwan or niloko. In a month, siguro bigla nalang to mawawala ng di ko inaasahan.
Each day feels like forever. Sobrang bagal ang takbo ng panahon at oras. At kailangan maging strong at patient sa mga nangyayari sa Earth.

Haist! May ibang bagay pa ko na dapat isipin kaysa to. Lalo na may issue kami sa isa kong medium project. *sigh* Lesson Learned.
Sana hindi bumaba ang CSAT na binibigay ng client sa project. :( At buti nalang mabait yung mga business counterparts ko sa 2 medium projects ko.
At dapat matapos ko yung Quality documents ng isang role ko by Monday para hindi kami mag-red score. Deadz ako kapag nangyari yun. -_-
Sa isang small project ko, external forces may cause delay. XD At masyado more time na nasspend ko sa medium projects ko.

At syempre, I have the 5'o clock ME TIME every day sa rooftop - pag di umulan. ^_^
An hour or an hour and half every day to look at a distant mountains and trees and reflect. I miss dong this when I was a kid, ang pagrereflect.

Nothing is impossible with Him. =D

swag

Describe the mood. 

Leikeze Van Helsing
Grand M0nde
Earth, Solar System

STRESS!! +_+ XD

I wanna die.

I wanna kill myself.

I wanna.. Argh!!!

Stress!!!!!

It's killing me.

Wat to do. Wat to do.

Otoke.. Doushiyou..

My life's now a mess.

Couldn't explain it.

I hate what I'm feeling now.

My lil' sister is much affected. And so do I.

I just don't make it obvious. 

I think I gotta start preparing for myself in da future.

It's a disease. And it is spreading rapidly.

I hate it.

Age gap is very big.

It's not suitable in the eyes.

I hate it.

Why does it have to be like this.?

Why does He permitted something like this to happen.?

Wae? Wae? Doushite? Doushite?

I wanna go home now.!!! 

Or go somewhere else where I wanna be myself alone.

STRESS!!!! +_+

temporary happiness vs everlasting happiness.. don't know!

If it's gonna be true. Then I got no choice but to just accept it no matter how huge I am against it. 

What I acquire yesterday.. Though it makes really no sense because they're literally just wants..

(Back to the main topic..)

What am I gonna do? My dream of studying MBA in London might be like just a bubble. 

I love kids. But producing of these without plan makes me watever. You know what I mean.

I'm a very concerned human being. Though no matter how hard I'm convincing myself that I am not compulsory to help them,

I still do because I'm a human being. I'm selfless too. I know myself.

If someone really needs my help, he'll/she'll voice it out or not, I'm still goin' to help.

I'm a concerned human being. That's how God created me--to be sensitive to the feelings and thoughts of others.

If it will gonna be really true, my Plan B is to ask/plead for my auntie's sponsorship for my Masters.

I'll say that I'll pay them back after I have graduated and have a high-paying job.

I gotta really study hard to have a exemplary high-paying job. Then I'll work hard to be rich.

After that, there'll be no more problem about helping people around me--'cause I'm already rich.

About myself and my future life, specifically having my own family? 

Nah! I don't know. With the things happening to people around me make me not to think about such things anymore. 

Let all these things be unto Him. Let your will Thy be done, Oh God. 

wata life.. money + relationships + stuffs + ...etc.

I really don't understand L. Sometime I would want to ask L straight 'bout what's the problem. 

Ask the schedule.

I thought L will show up to get the business L wanted.

But no shadow was seen.

It keeps on repeating.

I even waited for L in Market2x last Nov30.

It's fine to though 'cause we walked around and saw Yuri.

But then, it's someone a pain if I'm going to consider it.

Fortunately, I really don't mind.

'Cause you know, I'm expecting anything now in my life. 

This coming week, if L is going to show up.

I'll just ask my friend to get the business L wanted to hand to me long time ago.

Maybe L just wanted to see my friend and just using me. Haha.

Nyway, I don't mind 'cause I don't care.

It's really obvious since College days. That's why It will not be a shock anymore. 

We went to day to Tiendesitas.

Watched the event of RX Rhythm Street.

Failed to find Ragdoll at Pet Village. 

Maybe I'll be able to have it when I go to other country. 

Went to SM Marikina afterwards.

Saw the 46" TV I would like to buy for our guest room.

I want to get rid of the big stuffs there. 

Of course, I will not tell it to my mom.

'Cause surely, she'll shout at me and scorn at me me. Haha.

I don't care if my mom will get angry at the time I already have that TV. 

Went to MAC store and I would like to buy iPod Nano.

But then, it will be a least priority 'cause I don't have money. 

There's also a bluetooth headphone.

But then, i's gonna be a least priority. 

Bought an external dvd-rom but unfortunately, my installers are gone. 

Thanks for cleaning up my room soooo good. 

Life is really...good.

As time goes by, I'm being careful with my money.

If I held my money tight back on College,

this time, money's gonna be so tight in my hands. Haha. XD

Maybe noone will believe me. Haha. Even myself, I don't. 

But let's just see. 

to-do..to-do-not..to-do..hope so.. XD

Wha-what am I gonna do?

With all these junk, all these junk

Inside my mind?

Nothin'.

It's just..

Effort is really useless. Effort nga naman..

Resources too.

Recycle all the way na naman? Tsktsk. XD

Jigeumeun So Nyu Shi Dae. Appaereodo So Nyu Shi Dae.

Yongwonhi So Nyu Shi Dae. So Nyu Shi Dae, saranghae!!!

-Not between life and death-

Very Short Term Goals (This week):

- Gym later after 9 days of absence (I guess).

- Will received unit tomorrow.

- Gym on 30 'cause it's holiday! Yeah!~ 

Short Term Goals (Dec '11):

- Pay credit line bill using Dec salary.

- Buy SP Concert ticket for Jan '12.

- Will received GG's Japan 1st Concert Tour DVD

Long Term Goals (2012):

- Visit S.Korea.

- Take OCPJP on Jan.

Medium Long Term Goals (2013~):

- Visit another Asisan countries.

- Buy stocks, though small.

Uber Long Term Goals(~):

- Migrate to UK after 2-3 years.

Ginawang To-Do List?