What I deserve

I guess, my hunch is correct.

Sana hindi ko sya pinili balikan. 😅

Anyway, it's my fault. I should have chosen someone who is brave enough, strong enough, and independent enough to stay with me - through thick and thin.

Haha! GCQ naman. At estimate to go back to work is next year. I still have ample time to prepare myself and look for my own place. And maybe find the right partner for me. 😊

Malungkot lang kasi the person I always choose always end up not choosing me. So why still fight over and over again for the same person? "We all deserve someone's better."

I'm an optimistic person. I'm very confident I'll soon find what I deserve.

So help me God.

The gentle reminder

Haaay. Ang hectic na nga ng work minsan, stress pa ang makulong sa bahay, tapos samahan mo pa ng nag-aalburuto na jowa during the red days.

Di ko naman hiniling mga to. Actually, I preferred going back to the days where my life is peace and quiet. Days where I was just traveling, spending for myself only, and not thinking anything else aside from my furbabies, hobbies, and family.

Maybe because, hesitant pa ko i-splurge ang resources ko to someone else. Big chance, maiiwan na naman ako magisang luhaan - luhaan sa empty pockets. Hahaha!

I should still think of myself only. Perks lang yun outside my self and my furbabies. Kung baga, kapag may extra, dun lang. 😋


Thank you God for reminding me. 😊

——

My queen? Actually di pa ko 100% sure na si チャ na yung queen na i-seserve ko. Gaya ng sabi ko nun, I need at least 2 yrs, to prove na deserve nya at deserve ko.

Weird dream

The other night, can't remember when, I dreamt of K. And it's a sad dream. I was still chasing her - not the stalker level - even though she was avoiding me because she already has a boyfriend.

If there's such thing as the one person that "I would love to end up with her/him", that's her for me. I liked everything about her. I liked her for a day way back in Grade 5. The one person who was courageous enough to hold my wrist and drag me to somewhere (in school).

Then in 2nd year highschool, she became one of my school crushes. Rank 3rd. She's not my first love, it was A. But I never had the courage to tell to my crushes my feelings. Crush #1, just a plain crush from 1st-4th HS. Crush #2, became my first love from 3rd HS to 3rd College. I let go after that. Crush #3, I didn't know that I was subconsciously having a crush on her until we became 3rd HS. Since then, she's my on and off crush. I adored and respected her. And even after graduating from college, I never had the guts to tell her how much I liked her. Not until last year, she finally have her first boyfriend. I didn't mind because she's just a crush from the past.

Then out of nowhere, I dreamt of her of me chasing her. Tsktsk. She's a fine woman I think and I wouldn't dare to disturb her. And I'm already happy with my life now. I don't wanna go back to the past. They're just plain happy memories I will cherish till I die. What's more important to me now is my present.