In time

Ayaw ko na God.

No matter how hard I try to screen all the bad stuff from her, she'll always look at the negative side. And in the end, it's my fault - always my fault.

It's been a trauma to me but I'm trying my best to accept, forget, and move on from it.

It's true that I wanna be always around for her. I don't wanna see her get lost again. I wanna guide her as much as possible. And when the time has come that she finally realized she needed a man, I can be an eldest sibling and bestfriend to screen all the men before choosing someone who she can get married with.

Because of this incident, the only thing I can do is atleast give her the best life she deserves. It does not exclude giving her to a man. As long as that man can provide all her needs and wants in life, she'll be fine. And someone who will not take advantage of her weaknesses. Someone she'll grow up with. And hopefully, someone who is good looking than me. 😆

Don't know if she'll understand my real intention. But you know God my heart and my mind. Always lead me to your greatness. Keep me away from the people and things that lead me to pitfalls.

This is the reason I really need to get rich and successful. When I do, I don't have to beg for someone's time and affection. I don't have to be an option or second choice anymore. I don't have to borrow money and be in debt. 😆 I will be the second/third after God and family to someone. 😁

In time, the truth will be revealed. The truth will set us free.